The 10 Mustn't do to a child:

10 Mustn't do to a child

1. Screaming

The Prophet never raised his voice on a child, women, friends or otherwise. Also, read the book Scream Free Parenting by Hal Edward Runkel.

2. Blaming

Anas ibn Malik said: “I served him [the Prophet ‎ﷺ ] for nine years, but I do not know that he ever said to me about anything I did, why I did that, or about anything I had neglected, why I had not done that.”

Anas served the Prophet since the age of ten.

3. Continuous instructions

Pure orders and instructions –without first convincing or persuading- turn the child into a machine rather than a human being.

4. Threatening

An attitude driven by fear is a hypocritical one and does not indicate true genuine change. Ineffective on the long run.

5. Sarcasm

”O you who believe let not a group scoff at another group… "(49:11). Mocking a child hurts their self-respect.

6. Cursing

”A believer is neither a defamer nor a curser nor coarse nor obscene." (Hadith)

Bad words directed at a child teach him cursing, which later he might use against others, including parents or relatives.

7. Comparing

Comparing creates jealousy, puts the child on an aggressive defense, and is terrible for self-esteem.

8. Continuous advising

In the hadith "The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) used to take care of us by preaching during the days fearing that we may get bored."

A two-year-old should be able to concentrate on a particular task for at least six minutes, and a child entering kindergarten should be able to concentrate for at least fifteen minutes.

9. Mistrust

Not giving the child the benefit of doubt and continuously interpreting negatively his words or actions weakness mutual trust breaks communication and hurts self-confidence.

10. Violence

The Prophet never hit a child. Beating is an easy fix, but doesn't not, on the long run, change behaviour.

Hesham Al-Awadi, author of Children Around the Prophet: How Muhammad ‎ﷺ Raised the Young Companions (available in paperback and Kindle.)

https://www.amazon.com/Children-Around-Prophet-Muhammad-Companions/dp/1986793443

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