-
*...AN IMPORTANT REMINDER FOR PARENTS...*
*Favoritism among Chîldrēn….an Injustice indeed*
“My brother is the only one in the house who gets any attention. He always gets Ēverything he wants!”
“My Dad prefers our oldest sister to the rest of us. He always praises her, and no matter what good we do, he never appreciates it!”
This is a common problem that we see among many Muslim households today. And that is the problem of favoritism among Chîldrēn.
Parents may show their favoritism for many reasons. Favoritism could be shown to the oldest or the youngest. It could be a preference of a son over a Đaughter or the preference of a Chîld more beautiful than the other or simply for no apparent reason at all.
Favoritism comes in many ways. It could be in the form of showing more affection to a child, or excessive praise of one to the neglect of others, giving gifts to one Chîld only or giving better, more expensive gifts to one Chîld in preference to others. It can even be favoritism by simply ignoring one Chîld as compared to the others.
Yet, Islaam condemns all kinds of biases and injustices and indeed, favoritism is a kind of injustice. A person is not being just if he shows favoritism.
*“Verily, Âllāh (ﷻ) enjoins justice, and doing good, and giving (help) to kith and kin.” (Surah an-Nahl:90)*
Justice must be maintained in everything, even in how often we look at or speak to each of our Chîldrēn.
The following Hadeeth shows us how important it is to avoid favoritism when dealing with our kids.
In one narration reported in Sahih Muslim, a person wanted to give one son a gift, *Rasūlullah ﷺ enquired if had other Chîldrēn?*
That person replied,
“Yes.” *Thereafter, Rasūlullah ﷺ asked,* “Have you given all of them something similar?” He replied, “No.” *Nabî Karēēm صََلَِّﷺوََسََـــلَِّـم then responded by stating,* “Do not call me to witness *(the gifting of only one son)* for verily I do not bear witness to injustice.”
In fact, it is one of the rights of our children that we treat them equally.
*Nabî Karēēm صََلَِّﷺوََسََـــلَِّـم said in another worded hadith:*
‘...Ask someone else to bear witness to this.’ Then he said: ‘Would you like your children to all honor you equally?’
The man said, ‘Of course.’ He said, ‘Then do not do this. (ie. then treat them equally and justly.’ *[Muslim]*
Source: received through whatsapp message